I wanted to share this post that I wrote on Facebook on December 15, 2015, so you can get a sense of the journey that I have been on. I think that it is important because you see me know after I have become a lot stronger. This post gives you a bit more of the raw emotion and fear that I felt when I first started to share some of the difficulties that I encountered as a new mom. FYI – In an effort to be raw and unfiltered, I’m sharing the post exactly as it appeared on Facebook so please forgive any typos.
Testimonial Time: This post is long and I’m kind of nervous to write this, but I don’t know who this will help so I’m going to do it anyway.
Before my twins were born I dreamed of having a vaginal birth, cloth diapering, and only giving them breast milk. However, I tried to deliver vaginally but ultimately had to have a c-section. I started off breastfeeding but I didn’t know what my body wasn’t producing enough milk and initially my babies were losing weight so I had to supplement with formula to ensure that they were getting the food that they needed. That broke my heart because I did so much research on breastfeeding and knew that breast milk was the best for my babies. Even though I supplemented with formula I still pumped and breastfed to ensure that my babies got what I could give them. Between recovering from the c section, which was no joke, and struggling to breastfeed I decided not to introduce cloth diapers so I could focus on my recovery and increasing my milk supply. Not being able to breastfeed was so emotionally draining because it made me feel like I was inadequate as a woman and that I wasn’t a good mom. Good moms and adequate women should be able to breastfeed their babies because that’s what our bodies are meant to do, right? Wrong! I learned that I had to forgive myself and treat myself with the same kindness, patience, and love that I treat my babies. I learned that even though I couldn’t meet the daily demands of my babies feeding schedules that anything was better than nothing. Despite everything I refused to quit although some days I wanted to. I continued to pump and do what I could to increase my milk supply. I researched so much by talking to people and doing online searches. I was determined to give my babies 100% breast milk.
I’m so happy to say that after 2 months God has so graciously allowed me to go from providing 20-30% breast milk to my babies to between 80-90%! Yesterday I only gave them 1 formula bottle each in a 24 hour period! God is so good!
I share this with you to say that motherhood isn’t easy but it is so amazing. If something is challenging then just do what you can and work through it. Surround yourself with a great support system and be patient with yourself. As long as you are giving your babies love and care, the rest will come!
I hope that this post shows you that if you are having breastfeeding challenges that you are not alone. Do not use this as a litmus test as your worth as a woman. It was difficult for me but by the grace of God I was able to get up to 100% breastfeeding for my twins. To this day, it still remains challenging, but I make it work. If you are unable to exclusively breastfeed your children or do it at all then it is ok. Remember, your job is to cover your children with love and care. If you are unable to breastfeed and feel guilty, then read this post by my friend Gwen Jimmere of Naturalicious for more support. Click here to read.
I hope that this post helps you to realize that if you are having difficulty, just focus on doing what you can and loving your child.
If you want to join a supportive community of other phenomenal single moms, then join the Phenomenal Moms Facebook Group. Click HERE to join.
Leave a comment below to let me know how this helps you!
If you know a single, savvy, millennial mom, then pass this on to her and invite her to the group.
Aisha Taylor is a single mom of twins, personal financial coach, work from home entrepreneur, and #1 Amazon Best Selling Author of the book “5+5 FNPhenomenal Ways to Save $100 This Week Without Killing Your Lifestyle.” Aisha has been featured in ESSENCE and Jet Magazine. She is also the Founder of FNPhenomenal (Frugal –n- Phenomenal), a movement designed to help single moms transform their finances, enjoy life, and stop living from paycheck-to-paycheck. It’s time for you to be Financially Phenomenal!
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